Try Not to Catch This

There's a relatively new viral disease being reported from around the U.S. and doctors are comparing it to the new viruses that keep evolving rendering current anti-viral medicine impotent.

This apparently incurable disease is called Neo-conitis. Symptoms are obsessive, compulsive feverish acts of deception and outbreaks of lies with the accompanying vomiting of previously swallowed deception and lies. In addition, many diagnosed with this illness have been reported to have been seen, oddly enough, "spinning". When interviewed by nurses, some patients who are infected give misleading information. Doctors used to recommend a strong dose of empirical evidence and some mental exercise once a day, but now this virus appears to be morphing into a stronger strain immune to truth and the past remedies are not working.

This is a serious viral disease that threatens all Americans and strangely enough it crops up with intensity a couple months prior to November in every even numbered year. Be careful because a handful of patients on this forum have been infected with what appears to be fatal cases of this disease. Doctors first reported cases of Neo-conitis in the U.S. around Sept.11, 2001 although others point out the breeding ground for the disease existed much earlier.

Results vary on treatment. Citing the liberal use of empirical evidence, some doctors have reported a few patients who were able to heal, though slowly, but still other doctors report increased head spinning when facts are used and a tendency to want to change the subject. Hopefully, soon there will be a scientific breakthrough for this painful malady that currently affects close to one third of the U.S. population over 18.

So, if you suspect any of your friends or acquaintances might have this 21st century sickness please tell them to see a doctor as soon as possible.

This has bee a public service announcement.